Saturday, April 26, 2008
It's been only two weeks but we're already loaded with 6 assignments. Count 'em, SIX. Okay, one a day for a week, no big deal amigo, you think, but by assignments they mean 500-word essays, 900 word journals, writing and rehearsing speeches and a whole lot more. The deadlines vary, some this week, some next week, some in the 11th week but still, I admit I am stressed. Because I know more things wicked are coming this way.
I've got a bloody assessed speech on Monday and I'm freaking out quite badly because a)I hate making speeches, or listening to speeches for that matter except if it's Obama or Mel Gibson from 'Braveheart' b)I really don't quite know how to make this speech c)The speech I have written out turns out to be too short, no matter how acceptably slowly I go along - which really sucks because I tend to shoot words out about 5/s (average is 3/s) when I get flustered.
I did a speech on Thursday, non-assessed stuff and I finished maybe one minute too fast! Damn, all the words just fluttered out of my head. I totally hate this class, now, even though I like the teacher and also the phonetics part. Thank God, thank God, we do modules here and I'll take this class for hopefully only 6 months. I CANNOT fail a single freaking subject.
I got really disappointed on Thursday's written comm class. We did a couple of grammar tests and only one person in my tutorial got full marks and it wasn't me. Not only was I disappointed, I was
disturbed. Social psych class seems okay, mainly because I already know what the teacher is going to do. No, I'm not a mind-reader or gifted with brilliant psychoanalytical skills. It's just that I've already read the text beforehand (actually I've just read through half the textbook. It makes for rather light reading, sad to say. They don't go into detail. It occurred to me that I actually do, really, regret not going to TP and take the psychology course offered. Damn them. Damn my family for making a big bullshit outta the whole distance thing! My halfsister from the Netherlands travels about 2 hours to work everyday, all right?) and also the lecturer went through it. All I need to do is slump into a chair and let my eyes glaze over as I take part in the other K's favourite hobby: daydreaming. Well I listen, because I like the teacher and also I'm afraid she might tell us something new, but only with one ear.
I think I rather like my class afterall. Well, some of them. The others...well, I don't talk much to them so I can't find whether I'll like them or not. I was wary at first but I think they are OK in general and sometimes they make me laugh, and sometimes I make them laugh. I've got a couple of close friends, too.
During the last Social psych class we did an activity which showed what we thought of our classmates. I observed that they don't quite know what to think of me. I suppose I can be real quiet sometimes and they think I'm really shy, and then I go and say something sarcastic or do deadpan humour. Well too bad for them. I don't have answers for them, because I don't know what to think of me. I've got many really bad points but I'm not, you know, evil or some badass chick. I can be pretty good and nice sometimes, but I'm no angel and it's not genuine sometimes.
Anyway they think I am rich and that my family owns a $150,000 car - because I have the 'rich girl' look. What, do rich girls look too-pale, waxy and spaced-out? Lol. My car...well I don't know what it costs. It's not a Porsche, but it's no beaten up pick-up truck. It's a dark blue(yay
my colour), sleek Toyota. Cambry, I think. My dad is obsessed with it and freaks if a dent or speck of dirt finds its way onto it. He doesn't like the fact he has to be apart from it for months at a time. I appreciate its leather seats and the very soft growl it makes as it cruises the roads and its audio system, but that's it.
They also think - and know - that I love 'quiet hobbies like reading and writing'. Why? ZH said because I look 'deep' and the class started going 'woooot' because they can be real jerks even though most of them are girls. I am innocent, but to my unexpressed rage and horror, I started going pink. Damn! When I get started on blushing, it
never goes away. Well, it does, but hours later.
They also think that I am close to my family, like to watch Chinese serial dramas, watch a few classical performances each year and know the 12 zodiac signs. They are all wrong, and also really weird. Well I do know the 12 western zodiac signs but not the chinese one, so they are half-wrong.
I went to try out for the Stage Actors thingo, and I decided it sucked! It wasn't as cool and fun as I thought. Also almost everyone there had bad acne problems and I wondered if it was contagious. I mean, really, people, is it
that hard to look after your skin? It can't be all genetics, you know. You MUST cleanse your face twice (but I recommend thrice because we are teenagers and our hormones are crazy) a day, use facial masks 2-3 times a week, tone and moisturize your skin after cleansing, exfoliate twice a week, and remember to leave those stupid zits alone and stop touching your face. That does sound like a lot of things to do, but it's actually pretty fast and it pays off. Unless you use crappy stuff. Or you can try a dermatologist, if you're got the moolah.
This is a very long post, but I had to worry about the assignments bit and I feel better now. I'm just so scared of failing anything. Nightmares from sec 2 come back to haunt me, days when I passed only English and Literature. I know I passed everything in Olevels and got 3 A1s, but you know...well I don't know.
i thought the world of you
9:45 PM
